Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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