I molested 6 butterflies tonight
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize