goodnight i made you a song goodbye
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
