I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
so much tequila, so little girl.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
