Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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