how can u be prego again
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
