doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
