He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
