I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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