Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
