Porn is love you can see.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
