why didn't you poke me back
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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