she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
my liver is dry heaving
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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