..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i can't believe i had my finger in that
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
