Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i came on her dog
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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