So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
