We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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