just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
