Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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