This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
