So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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