Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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