Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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