i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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