I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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