OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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