she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize