Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
