direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i drank out of a bidet.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
