He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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