My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
