my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Im part way to drunk.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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