Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
