I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
