i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
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spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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