So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
