so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
This is classic penis vs brain.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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