im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
