Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.

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(540): View more from Virginia

Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.

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(301): View more from Maryland

my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook

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(316): View more from Kansas

Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....

Fav 3 1486 908
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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen

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(519): View more from Ontario

I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen

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(917): View more from New York City

I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min

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