Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
