They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
