nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize