God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize