No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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