That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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