I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
