I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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