well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
and you said cock pushups were impossible
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize