the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
