OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize