69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
